i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
