Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize