I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
