The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
