My hand turned me down
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Randomize