i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
we're making bets on your personal life
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
