I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
