yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Randomize
