Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I supernannyed him into submission
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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