I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
