I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
