I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
