My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
