This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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