she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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