We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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