Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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