So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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