Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
