nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
