Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
