It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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