North Korea, Best Korea!
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Randomize