I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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