I hate all girls vehemently.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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