Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
im holly from the hills drunk
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize