I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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