i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
True strength comes from lack of pants
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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