So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Randomize
