HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
