i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
My dick has a subreddit
Randomize
