i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Randomize
