Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize