Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
My liver just had a heart attack.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Randomize
