Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
