no, he came in my armpit
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
