I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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