Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
