I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
