dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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