Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Thank you for not boning my boss.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
