then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
