exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
