3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
