You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Sext me about skeletons
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
