For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
The uberlube is also flammable
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
