Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm really into asian looking animals
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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