other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
