you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
