i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
